She failed. Thank god!
Stop living by the rules of others
Today, I want to share a story from an old Instagram post of mine that deeply moved me when I read it again.
It was a day where everything felt like a threat. Everywhere she turned she found another of her failures.
She knew that this is not her truth, she knew it is just a feeling. But a numbing feeling nonetheless…
She also knew her body has something important to say to her… But how can she hear it through the numbness, through the voices inside her head, through the feeling of not being good enough, through all the fears and all the shit? Ah…
She wasn’t sure what to do, so she did the only thing that always felt right to her. It kind of always felt like a true healing…
She took off her shoes and connected to the ground. Allowed the earth to hold her feelings and bring her back to her - into the body.
When she allowed herself to feel, her body said one simple thing: “Stop living by the rules of others”.
And that made her realise a deep truth…
All the voices inside her head, all the rules and to do lists were other people’s ideas of how to live a “good” life. And she wanted that for herself, so she tried to do it all. She tried to be the good girl.
And she failed. Over and over again. Thank god!
Because that day, she didn’t fail her truths, she didn’t lose her self in her life. No. She got lost in somebody else’s life.
And that opened her up. It opened a space for her to embody herself. Oh, yes!
Do you ever recognize those voices inside your head? The ones that aren’t your truth, yet you still find yourself trying to live up to them? Maybe, just maybe… you don’t have to.
Love,
Alenka
