Pushing your limits
When does pushing your limit stop being “a winning factor” and start becoming "just not worth it"?
Story time. :)
Uroš and I went for a hike, and because it was cold and windy (the kind of weather best described as “meh”), we decided not to go all the way to the top of the hill but instead aim for a specific tree. That became our goal. With that in mind, I chose to walk at a faster pace, pushing my limits a little.
A few meters before the tree—our finish line—I started to feel like I wasn’t respecting my body. In a perfect scenario, I would have stopped, taken a breath, blown my nose, and continued. But I didn’t. I didn’t want to disappoint the idea in my head of successfully reaching the goal (getting there fast and without stopping). I also didn’t want to mess up Uroš’s pace by stopping in front of him. So, I pushed on just a little bit more, ignoring my body. I didn’t want to be an inconvenience—not to Uroš, and not to my own expectations.
And then, of course, it happened. Just a second before reaching the “finish line,” Uroš casually said, “Let’s go to the top.” The absolute worst thing he could have said at that moment. I was exhausted, completely out of breath, and far beyond my limits. I thought I’d won—I thought I’d reached the goal—only to have it taken away a second before crossing it. And I just started crying. Profusely. It was a mix of panic from being out of breath, feeling like a disappointment (because I couldn’t continue), and the overwhelming realization that more effort was still required. Poor Uroš, not knowing what hit him, just stood there wondering what the fu*k had just happened.
So, what did happen? That situation was an exact reflection of how I often feel in business. You set your goal. You know it won’t be easy, but you go for it. And there’s always a part of you focused on how the journey will look to others. You want to prove to yourself—and everyone else—that you can do it, and do it fast. But then you start to feel like you’re pushing yourself beyond your limits. And you tell yourself that’s necessary—that it’s what growth requires. Then comes the moment when you know you should stop, take a break, and recalibrate. But you don’t. You don’t want to disappoint others—your partners, your colleagues—or yourself.
And then, just as you’re about to reach your goal, completely on the edge of your capacity, the finish line moves further away. Suddenly, it feels like too much. Like there’s no way you can continue. But here’s the important part—what happened next.
When I allowed myself to stop, feel all the emotions, and take a few deep breaths, I was able to continue. Slowly and at my own pace, but the strength came back. And eventually, I reached the top. But, to my surprise, it didn’t feel as good as it usually does. It didn’t feel worth it. Why? Because I wasn’t loving to myself during the journey.
So, I learned two important things:
When you feel like you can’t continue, sometimes all you need is a little rest and an adjustment to your pace.
If you don’t respect yourself during the journey, the destination won’t be worth it.
The last one hit hard.
Oh, and let’s not forget: How amazing Uroš is for holding space for me and completely understanding my process.
Have you ever had a similar experience?
Wishing you a wonderful Friday!
